Life Day by Day

I thought some of you might like to look over our birth plan. There still might be some minor tweaks to it, but this will basically be it.
<3


Tim and Holly Nelson’s Birth Plan

It is our sincere desire to have a natural childbirth; to be un-medicated with minimal medical intervention. We understand that unforeseen complications may arise which call for formal medical procedure and in that case, we will be flexible and kindly ask that our participation be welcomed throughout the decision making process including explanation of all options.
We greatly appreciate all your hard work and thank you for your support at this special time!

LABOR:
SUPPORT PEOPLE
· We would like Tim to remain with Holly at all times during labor and delivery
· We plan to have present both of the grandmothers (Daralyn and Georgia) and, if circumstances allow, Holly’s two sisters (Lindy and Amber) for labor and birth. We ask that during labor, small groups of family may respectfully come and go as we see fit.
· We grant no authorization for any non-essential hospital personnel to be in the room during labor or birth.
ATMOSPHERE
· Dim or natural light
· Relaxed and pleasant
PAIN RELIEF
· We plan on not using pain medication of any kind, except the use of local anesthetic if stitches are required
MEDICAL INTERVENTIONS
· We would prefer use of Doppler but will accept intermittent external fetal monitoring if needed
· Minimal vaginal exams, with Holly’s consent only
· No artificial rupture of membranes without Holly’s consent
· No labor stimulants or medications of any kind. We prefer walking, changing positions, and nipple stimulation
GENERAL PREFERENCES
· We would like Holly’s mobility unrestricted (freedom to walk, no routine confinement to bed or room)
· Light snacks and fluids as desired during labor
· Use of shower and jacuzzi as desired
· Labor in any position desired

DELIVERY:
PUSHING AND BIRTH
· Freedom to deliver in a comfortable, effective position
· We prefer spontaneous pushing, with gentle coaching to prevent perineal tear
· Warm compress, massage, and support for perineum
· We would prefer a natural tear to an episiotomy
· Please offer for Holly and Tim to touch baby’s head, and if position allows, Holly to help deliver baby
· No delivery aids used, e.g. forceps, vacuum, pulling, or spinning unless absolutely necessary
· Baby to be given immediately to Holly for breastfeeding and bonding
· We would like to discover and announce the sex of the baby
· Please allow cord to finish pulsing before clamping (3 or more minutes); ask Tim to cut the cord.
· Natural delivery of placenta. Please no pitocin, scraping, or pulling on cord.
CESAREAN BIRTH
· If a C-section becomes necessary, Tim to accompany Holly into the operating room. If possible, please wait for him to change into surgery garb before taking Holly into room to avoid any separation.
· Narrate events
· Skin to skin contact as soon as baby is stable.
· Baby to stay with a parent at all times if possible
· Breastfeeding as soon as possible


RECOVERY/POSTPARTUM:
NEWBORN PROCEDURES
· Newborn to stay with a parent at all times
· Please delay all routine exams 1 to 2 hours to allow for family bonding
· After the initial bonding time, please perform all procedures possible while baby is in our arms.
· If warming is required, baby to be placed on Holly or Tim’s chest for skin to skin contact covered with blankets.
· We refuse erythromycin placed in baby's eyes. Holly does not have Gonorrhea, Chlamydia, or any other infection.
· We refuse the routine vitamin K injection unless abnormal circumstances exist (please keep us informed. If it is needed, we prefer oral vitamin K be administered), as well as all vaccinations including Hepatitis B.
· If the child is male, circumcision will be performed 8 days after birth by our pediatrician.
INFANT FEEDING
· We desire to breastfeed the baby. Breastfeeding to be initiated immediately after birth
· Breastfeeding only. Please no water, pacifiers, artificial nipples, or formula
EDUCATIONAL NEEDS
· We will desire to see a lactation consultant before leaving the hospital

Well, we finally found the person we want to attend our birth. Her name is Catherine Shields and she is a CNM who delivers at Deaconess medical center here in Spokane. We feel really good about her. After dealing with Dr. Smetana who blatantly told us that we had to have erythromycin, vitamin K, a heparin lock during labor, etc. (all of which are not true - you can elect NOT to have those), and she said she did things we were uncomfortable with such as tugging on the umbilical cord to "help the placenta be delivered", cut the cord after about 30 seconds because "it stops pulsing around then" (when we know that it usually stops pulsing, on average, at least 3 or more minutes after delivery), we started looking at the midwives in the area.

We found a couple midwives who deliver at a birth center and they sounded brilliant at first, the only downside being that we'd have to pay for the whole thing out of pocket. After interviewing one of them, I did some more research and luckily ran across a forum that talked about the midwives in Spokane and almost everyone on there had some dire warnings about one of the midwives that worked at the birth center. Come to find out she has 2 closed and 1 open case of negligence. I looked it up and they weren't little "oops" things, but big judgement errors that could have cost lives. Needless to say we decided against them.

I did find good things about Catherine Shields on the forums, however, and luckily she is one of the 2 midwives in all of Spokane that our insurance covers. :) We went to interview her and everything sounds really great. We asked all the tough questions and they passed with flying colors. I am really looking forward to delivering with her and at Deaconess - we feel good about it. It is such a relief to have it all taken care of and "locked in".

I finally got the dresser we picked up a bit ago sanded down and painted. Yesterday we tried to put the new hardware on the drawers, but the screws kept snapping. :( Really cheap I guess. We're going to get some tough ones, install the hardware, and then I'll have a place to put everything that we get at the baby shower this weekend. :)

The tree in our backyard looks like it is a cherry tree of all things. It has begun developing little green cherries on it. We're really excited about it (well, me more then Tim to be honest :). We were wondering if it was a cherry tree because it had flowers similar to a cherry, and the leaves and bark fit a cherry tree, but it is such a big, nicely shaped tree that we figured it wasn't a fruit tree since they tend to be all scraggly and weak. I just hope they aren't pie cherries. :)

Well, that's all I gots to say today. <3

It's a beautiful morning again to day. Our new sprinkler (one that actually sprinkles where it's SUPPOSED to instead of re-adjusting it's own settings and just sprinkling skyward) is shooting away happily, Rain is taking her morning nap on the couch, Tim is at work, and I'm sitting here enjoying my oatmeal.

Tim and I have been busy on our yard re-seeding areas that our lovely fore-renters neglected, getting all the tall grass whacked down, mowing, raking, and watering our huge yard and we also pulled up two really ugly bushes that lined our driveway and replaced them with roses. Our next project, which we will hopefully hit today, is to pull out another bush that is really poorly placed on the side of our house. We've already planted a Korean lilac in a much better location to take it's place and keep the side of the house from looking bare. It is so nice to drive up to the house now and not have it look dark and over grown. :)

One of the people who live across the turn around on our little street had parked a big trailer in front of our house and it had been sitting there, over-hanging into our side yard and taking up parking, ever since we moved in. We were all set to call housing this week about it when, miraculously, it disappeared! We haven't seen it since, so hopefully it's gone for good. If it does come back though, we'll be complaining about it. I don't know how people can feel okay parking their stuff in front of other people's houses (overhanging their yard and taking up their parking - not to mention just making their yard look cluttered) instead of parking it in front of their OWN house.

Now that the weather is so nice, I've been trying to get out and take a nice long walk everyday. Rain has really been enjoying it too. :) It's funny because we make an odd pair and draw a lot of attention as we go by. Rain, on her own, draws a fair amount of attention because of her looks, but then seeing a round, pregnant lady walking her seems to double it for some reason. It's kind of funny to see everyone do a double take at us.

I bought "The Business of Being Born" on half.com and it came yesterday! It is really, really good. It points out some of the issues facing hospital births, and shows statistics, but it does also show that everyone's heart is in the right place...it is good. If anyone wants to see it, let me know!

Speaking of babies being born, we spoke to Deaconess hospital and they are much more willing to work with our wishes then Sacred Heart, so we will likely be delivering there. When we asked them what their policy is for parents who wish to refuse the Hepatitis B vaccine, the routine Vitamin K shot, and erythromycin and they just said "Oh, you just have to come in and sign a waiver of liability." They were really very friendly and helpful about it. It was very nice to come across that...that's the first time, so far, that anyone in mainstream health care hasn't given us a really hard time about it. On Monday we have a consultation interview with a midwife who delivers there at Deaconess whom we've heard a lot of good things about. Wish us luck! :)

Well Tim just got home for lunch so I better sign off. <3

This weekend Tim had Friday through today off. It has been nice. :) On Saturday Josh, Amber and I went to a Josh Turner/Carrie Underwood concert. Tim didn't really want to go, and didn't want to spend that much money on something he didn't really want to do, so he stayed at Josh and Amber's and babysat the boys.

The concert was really good. It was the first real big concert that I had ever gone to, and it was fun to see how it all works.

Yesterday the Hollenbecks invited us to go on a hike with them. We brought along Rain and Rusty and hiked a good hour along Spokane River. It is at flood stage so it roaring along very impressively. We all got a lot of mosquito bites and had a good time. :)

Today Tim and I are doing our yard work. Weeding, weed whacking, mowing, cleaning up dog poo, watering the lawn etc. It's a perfect day for it...slightly overcast but pleasantly warm. Anyway, speaking of which I just heard Tim start up the lawn mower so off I go to rake up the clippings. I hope everyone is having a great Memorial day too!
<3

Today we went in for a check up appointment, as well as to talk to our doctor to get a feel for her, and her philosophy on pregnancy and birth. Overall she seemed good - a few things we disagree about...such as she tugs on the placenta to help deliver it instead of letting it come naturally, and she would suggest the use of pitocin if I am, for example, staying at 3cm for 4 hours, or if I am not going into labor fairly quickly after my water breaks. All stuff that we can work with as we get to know each other and when/if they arise during labor/delivery. But then I double checked with her that I need to talk to the hospital about the vitamin K shot and erthromycin, and not her. She said yes, but restated what she said at the last appointment that we cannot refuse either of those procedures... This is not true. I chalked that response up to her just not knowing that we can refuse any and all treatment we want (that in itself is unsettling) but when I pushed her for an answer on who we would talk to about that at the hospital, she got really adamant and leaned forward and said that "it is a bad decision, Holly, as a parent, to refuse those." Being anti-confrontational as I am, I didn't say anything, but did press her for an answer until she said that yes, we should talk to the head nurse at the hospital about it. From then on, both her and I were a little uncomfortable with each other and you could tell we were sizing each other up.

Tim and I couldn't believe that she said that it was a bad decision as parents to refuse Vit. K shots and erthromycin. Because after all, we all know it is a sign of bad parenting to spend hours and hours researching the pros and cons of this, praying about this, toiling over this, sweating over having to fight the system over this. (<--sarcasm) After all I have read, for a healthy woman with a healthy pregnancy, a healthy birth, and a healthy baby, it is much safer, and healthier, to not use erthromycin or give the Vit. K shot. The vast majority of doctors cannot disagree with this, and if you push them, some will admit it is true. The only reason it is routine is for those that don't know if they have an STD infection (so have to use erthromycin) or if it was a difficult delivery or if there are other issues which could cause hemorrhage (then Vit. K is a life saver).

It makes me so mad that the few couples who do actually take the time to research this and know their options, are healthy, and are putting the health and safety of their baby over their own comfort and ease are persecuted as "bad parents". It is so backward. Gah.

Anyway, as soon as we left Tim said that we're going to look into the Spokane Midwives again, even though we have to pay out of pocket for it, so we'll see what we can find out about payment options. It would be such a relief to have the baby at a birth center with a midwife instead of having a hospital birth with a doctor. I feel like going to a hospital and having a doctor is like going into enemy territory - not a relaxing situation in which to give birth.

What a beautiful day today! It's about 70F and not a cloud in sight. Unfortunately, I caught a cold somewhere and have been suffering through it yesterday and today. I'm feeling like it won't be sticking around for long, but it's a pain while it has its hold. I had been getting spoiled since this is the first cold I've had since I got pregnant...I was hoping I'd skip this whole cold/flu season. :)

On Wednesday there was a bulk item pickup for the housing here on base and anyone who had old furniture, appliances, yard stuff, etc. would put them out for the garbage man to pick up...However, it's also a time for everyone on base to drive around and pick up anything they want from those piles! :) It was so much fun - like a giant, free garage sale. We were all so blessed as well... God must have been listening to our "need to buy" lists and He provided almost everything on them...for free!! Mom and Dad were here as well because Dad needed to look at a motorcycle, so they got to come along. I bet between the 4 families (we picked up stuff for the Vassars too) we ended up saving at least a couple thousand dollars. It was amazing.

Just Tim and I got a complete living room set - sofa, love seat and recliner (in fantastic shape!), a baby swing, a crib with a matching changing table, a dresser (only needs new handles), a standing lamp, a bread maker, a patio set, a BBQ, a chest to put a bunch of Tim's computer gadgets in, some clothes for Tim, a woman's mountain bike, a weed whacker, and a few small decorations. All of this stuff is in really terrific shape! If we had gotten a dining room set, we'd have hardly anything left on our "need to buy" list. We're so excited. :D

I have been starting to water our lawn and seeded one of the huge dirt patches the previous renters left in the yard. Hopefully it grows quickly and well. We need to get another bag of seed to finish off the rest.

I have to go rotate laundry and the sprinkler, so I'm off for now. <3

It has just hit me that on Sunday I will be entering my third trimester. Wow. Can you believe it?! I never thought that I would truly ever be pregnant. I always wanted to be pregnant, pretty much my whole life and have always been fascinated and excited at the prospect, but it seemed too good to be true - one of those things that happened to everyone else but not to me. Now here I am about to enter my 27th week with, as my doctor said, "everything looks just perfect." Wow.

I have been having one of those weird weeks that has struck only two or three times this pregnancy where I just know I'm being strangely hormonal. I really have to watch my emotions and hold them up against logic before I let them take root. I must say, though, that this week has been weirder then others. I'm having the typical "I'm just not happy for no good reason" times, and 2 seconds later the "the world is so great", but it has also bled over into my dreams now. For example, I had a dream recently where I have gotten into a physical fight with my Mom. Weird, since everything is really good there, and I don't feel any tension about that relationship at all. Then, I've had dreams where I wake up with real tears running down my face for no good reason...and last night I had a dream where Tim and I got into a HUGE fight and then a short while later I was all over him. TMI probably I know. But they are really bizarre up and down dreams. I also find I have to be careful about what I talk about because if it is at all upsetting to me, I will cry. No control over it at all. I'll be talking along just fine, feeling just fine, then I notice my throat gets a frog and the tears start puddling. It's irritating really.

On a completely different note, our plants are beginning to sprout! I'm really looking forward to finding out what kind of plants we have. :) One good surprise so far is that the tree in our backyard is getting blossoms on it. It will be so pretty in a couple weeks! I'm not so sure about our rosebush in front, however...It was left a complete mess, so before it started to warm up I went out, followed some rosebush pruning instructions and pruned it down to a manageable (and according to the instructions a "healthy") level. Unfortunately, I think in the process I cut off so many of the outer branches that all the parts that actually grow leaves were pruned off as well. I'm guessing this because I see absolutely no buds coming out of the remaining stalks, though they are obviously alive, and yes, healthier, then they were. So now we have a clump of thorny sticks poking out of the ground. Anyway, we'll see how it goes.

Well it is bed time for me. Good night all. <3